Tax Rebates

Throughout my working life, when it came time to fill out our tax returns, most of us could manage a rebate of only a few hundred dollars, but there would always be someone boasting about a rebate of two or three thousand dollars.

"What are you claiming on?" I would ask.

"Overalls for a start."

"What else?"

"Work boots."

"That's about $4.50 in rebates so far. What else?"

"Oh heaps of stuff."

"What sort of stuff?"

"All sorts."

And it would be about now that my workmate would decide I wasn't quite the sort of company he was looking for after all; and he would head down to the other end of the lunch room and talk to someone who was little less inquisitive.

During a working life of fifty years, I probably had that conversation about forty times - almost always with those exact words in that precise order. Lying factory workers don't have much imagination.

USA Voter Turnout

David Barton, a devout (and devious) Christian, is desperately encouraging his followers to vote for Donald Trump at this year's presidential election. He is claiming that there was a 100% voter turnout during the first 200 years in America, and now it is time for Christians to ensure that the same thing happens again in 2016. He says,

So, in our case, as Christians, we don't have a right to vote, we have a responsibility to vote ... And that’s why you will find that for the first 200 years after we started having votes in America, voter turnout in America was 100 percent. 
https://soundcloud.com/rightwingwatch/david-barton

It's all bullshit though. Voter turnout in America has never been close to 100%. It occasionally reaches 80% but it has also been as low as 6.3%. David Barton (devout and devious Christian) is once again "telling lies for Jesus".

Interpreting Dreams

After leaving school I became an itinerant fruit-picker, following the crops from one end of the country to the next - apricots, grapes, olives, oranges, lemons, onions, potatoes, tomatoes - you name it, I picked it.

Being a dopey teenager I lived for the moment with not a thought for the future and spent my wages as soon as I earned them. I would hitch-hike into a town flat broke, and after two months hard work I would hitch-hike back out again - still flat broke!

Sub-consciously though, I must have been aware that I had chosen the wrong lifestyle because I had a recurring dream: I was on a train that was just pulling out of the station when I suddenly realised that I had caught the wrong train. I would rush to the door and start tossing all my belongings from the train, fully intending to jump out after them. But by the time I was ready to take the leap, the train was already going so fast that I dared not take the risk.

So now I was stuck on a train that was heading in the wrong direction with all my worldly goods scattered along the track-side with no hope of ever finding them again!

Not hard to interpret that dream is it?

What Goes Around Comes Around

When the Christians gained political power in the 4th century AD they immediately set about destroying every other religion in the area. The Emperor passed laws which included the death penalty for worshipping at a pagan temple and the ordinary Christians (who had been taught to love their neighbours and forgive their enemies) were delighted with the new situation, taking great pleasure in vandalising pagan temples, tombs, and monuments - a bit like ISIS today.

One of Christianity's greatest heroes at the time - Firmicus Maternus - demanded even more gruesome punishments when he wrote,

"Paganism, most holy emperors, must be utterly destroyed and blotted out, and disciplined by the severest enactments of your edicts, lest the deadly delusion of the presumption continue to stain the Roman world" 

And he went on to say,

"How fortunate you are that God has reserved for you the destruction of idolatry and the ruin of profane temples."

Now, 1,600 years later, the Christians have forgotten their own despicable history and are complaining that they are not getting a fair go in Muslim countries:

Christianity May Still be Eradicated 

from Iraq, Even after ISIS is Defeated

Religious leaders have been vocalizing the threat ISIS poses to the survival of Christianity in the Middle East since ISIS rose to power, but even now that many places are being liberated from ISIS control, religious leaders say Christianity may still be eradicated.

Just last week, the Iraqi parliament banned the consumption and sale of alcohol--something which is forbidden for Muslims, and thus seemed to be targeting Christians who are its primary consumers and retailers.

http://www.christianheadlines.com/blog/

Forbidden to sell alcohol. How awful for them. Will the torment never end?

Only Christians Can Fight Fires

This screenshot appeared on the Facebook page of Clewiston Fire Rescue. It told a story of brave Christian firefighters who utterly failed to save an historic building, but managed to rescue a bible...

Those atheists who were already members of fire services around the country were highly amused by the idiocy of the Christian claim. They left comments poking fun at the people who wrote such nonsense.

The Christians who pompusly declared that atheists were too cowardly to ever join the fire service were highly offended when the atheists started making jokes at their expense. They deleted the post. Brave little Christians. So courageous.

How Come?

Father who ‘repeatedly raped his 12-year 

old daughter’ gets 60-day sentence.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/

October 19, 2016

Father sentenced to 1,503 years 

in prison in daughter’s rape

https://www.washingtonpost.com/national/

October 22, 2016

Conserving Energy

I've just made a cup of coffee in the kitchen and carried the kettle back to the stove. Now I start making calculations...

Should I walk across to the wall and switch off the light and then walk back to the table, pick up the cup of coffee and carry it down to the lounge room?

Or should I walk to the table, pick up the coffee and then walk back to the light switch before turning around and heading off to the lounge?

Six steps to the light switch.

Five steps to the table.

Six steps to the kitchen door.

Seventeen steps altogether.

OR

Five steps to the table.

Five steps to the light switch.

Six steps to the kitchen door.

Sixteen steps altogether.

But wait...

What if I first turn off the light and then, instead of walking to the far side of the table to pick up the coffee cup, I walk to the near side of the table and reach across to pick up the cup from there? I could save a couple of steps.

But wait...

It's a fairly wide table and it will be quite a stretch. I might have to raise one leg off the floor to act as a counter-balance during the stretch. I might save two steps of walking but use more energy in the reach across the table.

And what if I can't quite reach? Then I've wasted all that energy stretching and now I've got to waste another three steps walking around to the far side of the table to pick up the coffee cup.

---

These are the sorts of calculations that have to be done when you've got emphysema.

Get it right and you can get through the day without too much trouble.

Get it wrong and you'll spend three minutes gasping for breathe before you can take that first sip of coffee.

And there will be another three minutes in recovery mode before you can even think about getting out of the chair to do something else.

Such is life...