Even Christians Think God Is An Arsehole Sometimes

Back in the early days God was wondering how far he could push the humans before they would dig in their heels and tell him to "Go and get fucked." He told Abraham to tie up his son, stab him to death with a knife, and then cook the little bastard. Abraham said, "Righto boss, I can do that for you; not a problem."

When they came to the place that God had shown him, Abraham built an altar there and laid the wood in order. He bound his son Isaac, and laid him on the altar, on top of the wood. Then Abraham reached out his hand and took the knife to kill his son. (Genesis 22:9-10)

Many years later God put himself to the same test and discovered that Abraham was right - killing kids was dead easy, 'not a problem':

For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him may not perish but may have eternal life. (John 3:16)

So here's the question for modern Christians:

If God tells you to kill your children, would you do it?

• If you answer "No," then your faith is weak and your trust in god is non-existent.

• If you answer "Yes," then you're an arsehole who shouldn't be allowed to have custody of children.

• If you answer, "God wouldn't ask me to do such a thing," then deep down you know your God is an arsehole but you just don't have the courage to come right out and say it.