Even Christians Think God Is An Arsehole Sometimes

Back in the early days God was wondering how far he could push the humans before they would dig in their heels and tell him to "Go and get fucked." He told Abraham to tie up his son, stab him to death with a knife, and then cook the little bastard. Abraham said, "Righto boss, I can do that for you; not a problem."

When they came to the place that God had shown him, Abraham built an altar there and laid the wood in order. He bound his son Isaac, and laid him on the altar, on top of the wood. Then Abraham reached out his hand and took the knife to kill his son. (Genesis 22:9-10)

Many years later God put himself to the same test and discovered that Abraham was right - killing kids was dead easy, 'not a problem':

For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him may not perish but may have eternal life. (John 3:16)

So here's the question for modern Christians:

If God tells you to kill your children, would you do it?

• If you answer "No," then your faith is weak and your trust in god is non-existent.

• If you answer "Yes," then you're an arsehole who shouldn't be allowed to have custody of children.

• If you answer, "God wouldn't ask me to do such a thing," then deep down you know your God is an arsehole but you just don't have the courage to come right out and say it.

7,000 Dead (Not A Problem)

Since the inauguration of President Rodrigo Duterte on June 30, 2016, and his call for a “war on drugs,” Philippine National Police officers and unidentified “vigilantes” have killed over 7,000 people.
https://www.hrw.org/report/2017/03/01/

The House of Representatives on Monday shot down the impeachment complaint against President Rodrigo Duterte for lack of sufficiency in substance.

http://news.abs-cbn.com/news/05/15/17/

The Philippines is an active supporter of the United Nation's peacekeeping and humanitarian development programs.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Philippines_and_the_United_Nations

In a Facebook post, Presidential Adviser on the Peace Process Jesus Dureza said that he asked the Pope to bless the Philippines, and the pontiff replied that he will also bless Duterte.
http://news.abs-cbn.com/news/01/18/17/

Conservative Christians

When they are children they frighten each other with stories about ghosts and the boogeyman.

When they are teenagers they frighten each other with stories about the end-times and demon possession.

When they are adults they frighten each other with stories about aliens and cloud-eaters.

This guy (Dave Daubenmire) has won an award for "broadcasting excellence", which gives you an idea of the low standard of broadcasting in America.

If ever you needed proof that conservative Christianity turns your brain to mush, then Dave Daubenmire provides it.

Link to his website 

Be Sure Your Sins Will Find You Out

Ken Adkins was the pastor at Greater Dimensions Christian Fellowship in Brunswick, Georgia, USA.

When 49 people were murdered at a gay nightclub in 2016, the good pastor tweeted, 

"I don’t see none of them as victims. I see them as getting what they deserve!"

Turns out this devout Christian has been fucking children who attended his church for years - and now he is getting what he deserves. He has been sentenced to a minimum of 35 years in jail for having sex with boys and girls under the age of consent.

http://jacksonville.com/news/

Even As Metaphor The Bible Still Doesn't Work

Who Could Have Done It? Who Could It Have Been?

MALÉ, Maldives — A liberal blogger who wrote satirical critiques of the Maldivian government and the spread of radical Islam died Sunday after being stabbed in the stairway of his apartment building.

The blogger, Yameen Rasheed, 29, had complained repeatedly to the police about receiving death threats, he said in an interview with The New York Times this year, adding that the police often failed to return his calls or dropped his complaints without investigation.

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/04/23/

Who Could Have Done It?

• The Republic of Maldives ... has become a source of recruits for the Islamic State.
• The government said at least 49 Maldivians had traveled to Syria to fight with the group, also known as ISIS
• The population is predominantly Sunni Muslim
• A more conservative strain of Islam has spread in recent years under the increasing influence of Saudi Arabia

Who Could Have Done It? 
Hard to say isn't it?

They All Talk Like This When They Get Caught

My overdose went viral — and it saved my life

A WOMAN whose overdose went viral last month said the negative publicity she received from it has actually given her a second chance at life.

Katrina Henry, who described herself as a “good kid” before getting hooked on Percocet and other drugs, said without the video, she probably wouldn’t have taken the incident seriously.

http://www.news.com.au

I'm guessing two weeks before the first relapse, two months before the next overdose, and two years before the next car crash.